My grandma made it through surgery. She lost all her large intestine and part of her small one. She is extremely septic and is on a ventilator. Her wishes are not to be kept on a ventilator long term. She only wants 72 hours. The doctor wants at least a week, but he will honor her wishes for 72 hours. She looks awful. The family is considering giving it more than 72 hours depending on how things look at that time.

I am done. I cannot do this. It is too hard and I am not strong enough. I cannot take care of the two littles, and Dustin who is in full-tilt-overboard-crazy-behavior-mode and Robert, while juggling work and the hospital visits, laundry, dishes, and showering. I am stressed to Stretch Armstrong proportions. I had a big slobbery, sobbig, ugly cry tonight. That was good.

I have heard the obligatory, "God will not give you more than you can handle" speech today a couple times. Well, I think God has grossly over-estimated my abilities. I am beyond my limits.