I had a talk with an acquaintance, for lack of a better word, who just got a job in her field. She works at a place for special needs kids and adolescents, kids with organic brain issues and similar diagnoses. I think her degree is in psychology or something of that nature. Anyway, I was just talking to her about her job and we got on the subject of behavior modification. She said something about changing their behavior to resemble "normal" behaviors.
I had a long talk about behavior modification and how it would not work for kids like my Dustin. (who would be eligible for this program she works in, but we have opted not to deal with yet another placement - especially one with violent kids exhibiting their outbursts for him to model) I just could not make her understand that kids who have "broken brains" cannot always be MODIFIED to make good choices.
Cindy made a great comment today. One of her children would love to play soccer for his school. It would be a wonderful outlet for him and something he could be successful at. His grades are not good enough so that probably won't happen. She said, "A carrot on a stick just doesn't work with kids whose wiring has been physically damaged either in utero or in their early childhood that was so severely lacking in either structure, safety, nutrition or nurturing." Far more eloquent than I, but exactly what I was trying to say.
This person also said something that raised my ire and at that point I had to walk away. She said, "During that ice storm a mom called as soon as we opened to see if we were taking kids. She wanted to dump her kid off so she wouldn't have to deal with them all day. We told her to keep him home and learn to deal with him there, since he IS hers." OH MY GOSH! Before I walked away I made the comment that NO ONE should be allowed to work in a field such as this if they have not lived with a child with special needs. "You" have no idea what it's like to parent them 24-7. Or even how their brain works unless you see it function in a family and on an hour to hour basis. And maybe that kid needed routine, or maybe mom needed a break which is what the center is paid for! Zoinks.
I must say this is a good person. She is young, naive and recently graduated with all these clinical ideas. I hope she sees the real world soon. I would LOVE to have her babysit, and I would conveniently forget to give Dustin his meds that day. Tee Hee!
Memories on a wall (and in a phone)
22 hours ago