Weekly woes . . .

I haven't blogged all week. The fact that I have been so incredibly busy may have something to do with it. Where do I begin?

My son with FASD (Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder) was hospitalized again on Monday evening. His impulsivity had grown to an alarming rate and with all the med changes his doctor had done over the past month, his psychiatrist thought it was time to re-admit Dustin. They took him in as an emergency admit since all the beds in the children's unit were full. That is not a prime situation for Dustin as too many kids (all with issues) do not make it easy to get much accomplished.

He has not had a real good week, which I am thankful for. I know it sounds funny, but I want them to see the true behaviors we are dealing with. The school sees horrible behaviors as well, and with the number of kids on the unit, I think they have been seeing those also. When we admitted him on Monday, his doctor made the comment "Have you ever considered residential care?" I freaked out. NO! I will not institutionalize my child. He is a 4 year old in an 11 year old body. He doesn't get consequences, behavior modification rarely works and NO I will not lock up a child I made a commitment to when we chose to adopt him! I would have loved to say all those things, but mostly I just cried and told him I could not do that. Robert was quite upset when I told him about that conversation and agreed that it was definitely not the time for residential care. I was glad that we are on the same page.

Today I went in for family therapy and for his treatment planning meeting. I kept hearing the therapist saying "he's making bad choices" and "you need to do the right thing". He can tell you what choices are the good ones, and he can tell you what the "right thing" is but HIS BRAIN IS BROKEN. He cannot equate the situation you talk about with the situation at hand. I pretty much told her that I was tired of the expectations being too high; that he cannot function in that manner and he probably never would. I explained that I feel only about 30% of his choices are defiance, and the rest are chemical and impulsivity. In treatment planning we visited the same issues. The doctor heard me out and agreed to some extent. He said that we should have no expectations when it comes to behavior, which is so very true. He began talking about residential care again and I emphatically told him I would not revisit that subject and that I would tell him if it was ever the right time. I told him I would *NOT* do that now and he should not mention it again. I totally respect this doctor and his opinions, but this subject is closed. I was so proud of myself!

Hopefully this weekend will help Dustin to calm down and give the new meds some time to take effect and see if they will work. We shall see . . .