Consequences . . .

We are having a very difficult time with Dusitn. Dustin is our adopted child who has FASD, Fetal Alcohol Syndrome Disorder. Now, is where I could copy every post I have ever written about Dustin and his behavior issues because it is a constant struggle.

I read a post on Claudia's blog today and it made so much sense to me. You cannot parent a child with FASD the same way as you parent "typical" children. They simply don't "get" consequences. Kari, who has been a wonderful resource for me about FASD and what it will entail for us in the future, wrote something I find teribly helpful. Here it is . . .

Consequences rarely work with kids who have FASD. To make a consequence effective it means that :

1) they need to understand the connection between what they did and the consequence

2) they need to be able to generalize their learning (If I get a speeding ticket I learn from it and apply that knowledge every time I drive from that point on- but a person with FASD might only make the connection in the same car and on the same road as the one he was driving on when he got the ticket)

3) they need to be able to remember what they did, remember the consequence, remember how the consequence affected them, apply that knowledge to future behavior, etc...

FASD is permanent brain damage that often affects the frontal lobe of the brain (decision making, impulse control, understanding abstract thought and cause & effect, etc..)and several brain areas involved in memory- especially short term memory. Consequences do not fix brain damage.

This sums it up for me. I wish every teacher Dustin has would read this everyday before school. (I need to read it everyday as well) We are having problems with him not getting social cues from the other children. He hits, sticks his tongue out, scratches, and flips his middle finger at everyone who walks by. He crawls around on the floor acting like a dog. He refuses to follow directions and locks himself in the time out room and refuses to come out.

We need to remember : His brain is broken!

Could they be any cuter . . .

My Baby is 3 . . .

Yesterday was McCartney's birthday. I can't believe she is 3 already. Time goes so very quickly. She is a joy of a child. Yes, she is strong-willed and ornery, but she has a wonderful sense of humor and is very loving. She knows more than you think, as she won't "perform" for anyone.

Every once in a while she will pop off with something and I'm like, "How did you know that". Like for instance Sunday. We were watching football and during the half they were showing highlights. She said. "Mommy look! Number 6 won." Since we have DVR I rewound the TV and said, "show mommy number 6." She said, "Right there" quite snot-ily and said "I told you". Sure enough. she was right! I was surprised she knew what a 6 was and so I began asking about other numbers. She knows most of them.

Harrison was very verbal early and was (and still is) quite happy to perform for you. He will spout off his newest "trick" at each turn. He would tell people in the grocery how to spell his name at two years old. He still spouts letters to people and tells them what it spells. McCartney is quiet and I think she just doens't KNOW things yet, but apparently she does she simply doesn't want to share them yet!

Happy Birthday McCartney, your mommy loves you terribly!

Where in the world did that come from? . . .

A few Harrison-isms from the weekend . . .

1. Harrison had put on a new pair of swim trunks while at my moms. He was heading to the hot tub and asked Papa if he liked them (they were balck and had flames on them) Papa said they were "cool" to which Harrison relied "Yeah, cooler that pizza parlors and rock-n-roll bands!"

2. Harrison asked Uncle Josh how old he was after singing Happy Birthday to him tonight. Josh said 29. Harrison said, "Next you'll be thirty". Surprised, my mom asked him how he knew that and he said, "Because I'm an expert counter."

Uncle Josh comes to visit . . .

My brother Josh lives in Minnesota. He is 7 years younger than me and were horrid to each other while we were growing up. He moved to Minnesota about 4 years ago to work with a friend for a summer and ended up loving the work and the state. My kids miss him horribly. We only get to see him at Christmas since he works so very hard and the drive is so long. Anyhoo, my mom and step-dad flew him home for his birthday this weekend. My kids ran him ragged. He and Harrison wrestled, McCartney climbed all over him and Dustin talked his ear off.

Here are a few pictures from the weekend. . .


Let's get ready to rumble . . .


Princess McCartney with her Uncle Josh


Josh & Harrison the Ornery



McCartney has Uncle Josh pinned


Singing "Happy Birthday" to Josh
**Note the black eye in this picture. Harrison decided to head-butt his uncle Josh while Josh had called a truce and was trying to watch football.

Crikey! . . .

I have been watching the Crocodile Hunter for many years. I loved Animal Planet before it was very popular, and Steve Irwin was my favorite. Over the years I have tired of his show, but I still think he was a wonderful man. It's unfortunate that he died doing something that is done by tourists and was not alltogether that dangerous. . .

SYDNEY: Steve Irwin, the ebullient Australian TV personality and conservationist known as the Crocodile Hunter, was killed by a stingray barb to the heart during a diving expedition, police and his wildlife park said.

The world has lost a great wildlife icon, a passionate conservationist and one of the proudest dads on the planet," John Stainton, Irwin's friend and producer who was on board Croc One said in the statement. "He died doing what he loves best and left this world in a happy and peaceful state of mind" he said.

Rest in Peace Steve.

Oh, What a night . . .

Yesterday was truly an adventure. The wait all summer was definitely worth it. Here are a few observations from the concert :

1. Kenny Chesney fans sure know how to tailgate. But, please remind me never to be an old woman who opens her van hatch and places a sign that says "Bar's Open" so I can mix drinks for all the young hotties walking around while shaking my old butt. . . enough said.

2. There are some funny T-shirts out there nowdays. There was a group of "kids" across from us and one had a T-shirt on that I don't think would get him a date. It said, "My Balls Itch". Not a good sign for prospective girlfriends. My favorite T-shirt of the day was "I Would Do Me".

3. Laura knows how to party. Thanks for the tickets, and thanks for the fun! Cruzan confusion rocks.

4. Uncle Kracker is a hottie, pure and simple.

5. The Pretty Princess rocked the house. It was a fun night and definitely an experience ending the tour at Verizon Wireless the band and "Mostly Crue" seemed to have a great time.

6. TBWYH can sing.

7. Kenny fans are rabbid. One4JC said it all when she said that it was like going to "the Church of Chesney".

8. Port-a-Potties suck. . . (and they don't flush do they Stacy)

9. Verizon Wireless needs a new plan on getting cars out of the parking lot. Getting there when the gates open and being close to the front is a bad thing when you are leaving the lot.

The adventure begins. . .

Well, I'm almost ready to leave to meet a friend, then we are heading off to the Kenny Chesney concert to meet one of my IIF (imaginary internet friends) Laura. I'm so excited I can't wait!

Not only have I "met" some awesome people through blogs and gotten to peer into their lives, I will get to meet a fabulous one face to face . . . and hear some GREAT music.

Wooohooo!